Thursday, September 4, 2008

Grey. My late night, insomniac induced, writing.

I came across this piece of writing a friend of mine wrote in her blog...Shes beautiful...absolutely gorgeous...a model, sociable...and would do anything for anyone...my thing is...if SHE can't keep a man happy...how are us 'average' ones going to do it?...this blog really spoke to me and I hope when someone out there reads it...they'll see the light at the end of the tunnel...

Men are led to believe that woman are their answer to righteousness. A good girl could save them from hell, and a bad one, could send them there faster. Black or white. Women are led to believe that there is something wrong with us when we don’t have a man! Without one we begin to fear we aren’t pretty enough, smart enough, cute enough, sexy enough. We begin distracting ourselves by forcing ourselves to become what a man wants. At witch point we choose, good girl, or bad, black or white. We begin molding ourselves based on what men and society depict for set role. Our success is rewarded with a “boyfriend” or a “booty call”! ……. lolI have had both! And each time I have found myself cutting into myself in order to feel alive! It wasn’t until I was near death, praying to God, that I had an epiphany.“It doesn’t matter !!! “I let it truly slide.I put down the knife, and said goodbye to all the men in my life. (father excluded) Without that fear and distraction, I became someone more like myself, grey. So where does love fit in? I’ve realized that love need require no action. That to simply love and except that I Am loved is enough. Proof is not required. Once you finally let go of the notion that it is, then do you start to feel, and receive its true rewards. I now also exude it, but only those capable can see.



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